what a difference a year makes

about this time last year michael & i had just gotten back from our rejuvenating vacation in chicago a month after the news of a fourth miscarriage. it's also the same time i found out i was pregnant, again.

i was scared. i knew i was going to have another miscarriage. and why not? nothing had changed, i was still damaged. i was scared of the toll this was going to take on my body. two dead babies in two months. i was scared of the toll this was going to take on my faith.

as i type this, audrey is nursing in my arms and drifting off to sleep. she'll be four months old on the fifteenth. this little baby fought for her life. she won over the same affliction which took the lives of her brothers & sisters. she's our little survivor. our little miracle. our answer to tearful prayer.

we drove to the beach yesterday (audrey's first time!) and stopped at corner bakery in anaheim hills for breakfast. we ate breakfast every morning we were in downtown chicago at a corner bakery down the street from our hotel. i loved drinking my hazelnut cream coffee, (BEST cafe coffee ever,) watching business people hurry by with their briefcases and shooing pigeons away from my breakfast panini. mornings are still my favorite time of day.

i ate the other half of my breakfast panini already. oh yes, it's that good. :)

www.jennylynnbaker.blogspot.com/2009/07/and-so.html